Your Sword Is So Big

I will admit, that I was impressed when I saw Your Sword Is So Big for the first time, I thought that it had the potential to be a lewd souls like game. Then when I saw that it cost less than a buck, I knew I had to give this game a try. Ok, so I did notice the rather insane amount of negative reviews that the game had, but….. it cost less than a can of cheap store brand cola so I thought what the hell, what do I have to lose by giving this a try. Plus, the main character looked like she had been really dedicated to doing her squats if you get what I am saying!

What’s The Story Morning Glory?

Hey, as I write this the Gallagher brothers have not fallen out and canceled the Oasis reunion so things are looking good in the world. Also, Your Sword Is So Big pretty much has zero story. That is not an exaggeration either, we play as a hot and badass female warrior and we are cleaning the land of Vikings, warriors, and monsters and that is about it. There is no narrative running through this. If you want a story with this game, you are going to have to come up with one on your own!

Death By My Blade

Think of Your Sword Is So Big as an arena style fighting game. You walk to an area, you kill a certain amount of monsters/enemies and then you move on to the next one. You earn XP as you go and this will help you become stronger and also give you new moves that you can do. The thing is, the progression is very linear, there is no skill tree or any real indication that you are progressing. You just get a few new random attacks that you can do and your health is a bit better. You take out the monsters, move on, rinse, and repeat. The character walks very slowly and some of the attacks feel like they happen in slow motion. To be honest with you, it feels more like a demo than a full game. However, if the character speed was a bit faster, I think this could be a fun game to dip in and out of for five to ten minutes here and there.

Stabbing The Bugs

While Your Sword Is So Big has a lot of negative reviews, to be fair, the developer tells you exactly what this game is, it is a game made by one person and it was never intended to be anything more than an arena battler style of game. Still, even with that being said, the game does have some technical issues. The character moves slowly sure, but the game also crashed on me a few times, enemies would simply not come to a place where I could hit them and there were even a couple of times when the game would not shut down, forcing me to have to manual shut down my PC to get out of the game. While these issues are undoubtedly annoying for sure, if you look at the positives, I am sure that the developer will have learned from their experience of making this game.

Who Ordered Cake With Their Medieval Badass?

Hey, I am more than ok with admitting that the badass fantasy chick strolling through a medieval land with a huge ass sword, with her ass hanging out of her outfit was a huge pulling in point for me! To be fair, this is not a horrible looking game at all, but there is no actual nudity or sex in this game. It teases you a little, but no more than games like Bayonetta or Stellar Blade do with their hot protagonists. I did keep feeling like I had seen the enemies and some of the background stuff in the areas before so I am not certain, but I would not be shocked if the game wasn’t using stock assets.

Pros:

• I liked how it had a kind of old school arcade arena battler feel
• The MC is very easy on the eyes
• I liked how her butt was hanging out of her outfit!
• I legit have played way worse action games than this

Cons:

• There is not much substance here at all, you see all it has to offer in five minutes
• The game is pretty buggy