Drake of the 99 Dragons

Drake, an undead Triad gangster, wields double firearms and Afafrwr-like abilities (wall running and bullet time) in his quest for revenge against the cyborgs who killed him. It's cheesy, but the action is supposed to make up for the story. Trouble is, the action ain't acting right. Here's what's painfully difficult in Drake-, seeing things, going places, and shooting enemies. In other words, everything. The camera is entirely manual until you get close to a wall; then it gets opinionated, showing the floor or nothing at all rather than, you know, bad guys or power-ups. Hellishly inconsistent wallrunning and double-jumping abilities make navigating these repetitive levels an excruciating ordeal. Worst of all, the game's autoaim is outright broken. Drake would rather send slugs into nearby walls than retaliate against the thug zapping him from directly ahead in plain view. Amazingly, he gets even more confused if multiple foes are present. You'll spend more time fighting with Drake's camera and controls than its dastardly robomen. Unless, of course, you don't play it

If someone gives you a copy of Drake, consider it your moral obligation to destroy it. The game's so broken that it's unplayable: The camera constantly spirals out of control, making platforming impossible, and the autotargeting is inoperative. More insane contortionist than cold-blooded assassin, when Drake does manage to hit something, he's pointing his guns in the wrong direction. In short, playing this monumental disaster is unconscionable. You'd be better off spending six hours outside EB, warning others of the impending misery.

If the folks behind XIII decided to take an unlikable, topless albino man and build a Max Payne rip-off around him, they'd likely come up with Drake. Unfortunately, the game has so many problems--unfair difficulty, outlandish controls, an alarming tendency on Drake's part to fall off ledges--that comparing it to Max Payne at all seems like an affront to Rockstar's adventure. It'd be a bit better with a saner control scheme, but as it is, Drake is an exercise in frustration and repeated death.